sex in a text :: sexting

9 Apr

When I started learning about sexting, I thought it was people CHOOSING to post pictures of themselves online in a sexy, provocative manner, half-naked or completely naked. I have come to understand, it is so much more than this.


We live in a cyber world where people’s identities are Facebook, Instagram, Twitter identities and people’s friendships are online more than face-to-face friendships. What we look like online can sometimes become more important than who we really are. We can become obsessed with how many likes or comments we get on our status update or a picture we just posted. The thing with this cyber world is we can say or post things online that we wouldn’t necessarily say or show others in real life. The freedom that an online identity brings can sound great but it can be quite risky.


Taking sexual images of yourself and sending them through text or online is dangerous. No one has control of where it will go. You may decide to take the photos down from the Internet site you posted them on, but they still will always be online somewhere. 88% of self-made sexual images (sexual sefies) end up on pornographic websites. Your sexting photos may end up on a porn website. This can have a big impact on your future.


If you are taking, sending or receiving naked or sexual pictures of yourself or others & you are under 18 years of age, that is an offence and you can be convicted of child pornography. Depending on the laws in your state you could end up on the sex offenders list which will have a massive impact on your future, especially when looking for jobs.


Before you post or share a sexualised picture of yourself or someone else either through text, email or online, please stop and think before you press “send” where this photo may end up. You really have no control on it.


Have you experienced sexual harassment or sexual bullying? Research shows that sexting is fast becoming sexual harassment and bullying. Girls are feeling pressured to perform sexual favors even if they don’t want to because that are constantly being asked on a daily basis to perform sexual favours. If girls say no, they are bullied and guys threaten to say horrible things about them publicly to destroy their reputation. If girls say yes to performing sexual favours, guys may take a picture of their online conversation post in on Facebook to show everyone the girls sexual availability. What is also concerning is guys are storing up sexual picture of girls in their phone and using it as a popularity tool, “look at all the girls I can get if I want to”, its all about being approved of by your peers. & this is at the expense of a girl’s sexuality.


A message to the girls: You are MORE than being someone’s sex object. You don’t need to display yourself as “sexy” or provocative to be accepted. You are not a commodity to be bought or sold or to be traded by guys to get “ratings” or peer approval. You are an individual with unique value. You are capable, intelligent and able to make a positive impact in people’s lives. Don’t allow anyone to sell you short of that.


If you are experiencing sexual violence or bullying, especially through social media, I am strongly encouraging you to talk to someone about it. This is real and it is wrong. Regardless if you or others think it’s harmless. We need this generation to stand up and say enough is enough, we should not have to be sexualised in this way.


& if you are a parent or involved in a young person’s life, please create an open conversation for them to talk about their sexuality & their experience in the world they live in. This is your opportunity to speak TRUTH and offer a counter culture message to this hyper sexualised culture we are living in.


What do you think about sexting? Comment below.



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